Sunday, August 16, 2015

I Am What I Am

I Am what I Am
I stand as I stand
The breath of God
The intimate contemplation
Of my Father's imagination
One of the greatest thoughts
God's ever had
I Am what I Am

Sunday, August 2, 2015


"Excess turns all gifts into curses."  Rohr - What the Mystics Know

Monday, July 27, 2015


Look In
Deep into this moment
From whence you glance
Look out 
At our sacred dance
Or this dreamworld trance
Either way
This is all Divine magnificence
A work of art
We're colors being painted
So intimately together
We're dancers becoming so intimately acquainted
Is the Sacred Director of our show
Our Father
So many children
But One life and soul
These infinite paradoxes
We'll eventually know
But till then
While contrasts assembled
Weights of glory prepared
Look out
Look in


Thursday, July 16, 2015

Success, Power and Being Right: The War in the Wilderness Temple

"I remember at the age of 5 saying within myself, "this is a beautiful and horrible place I find myself in.   It's an up and down world. I don't think I will be able to succeed here. "

From a very early age, it became clear to me because of the conditioning influences around me   success, power and being right was what life was supposedly about.  These things were drilled and re-drilled into me and a ruling consciousness became entrenched.  Early in life I believe I possessed an understanding of Being---a realization of my connection to all things, but I was pushed out of that paradise garden to live in an outer world of doing. I was born a Human Being but was inevitably conditioned into a false identity as a human doing.

Life for me begin to shrink from mystery and connection to certainties and a disconnection.  The virus of alienation had been downloaded into my soul and it became apparent to me that life was not about unconditional union and love, but merit, passing, failing, doing, the opinions of others, material trinkets, ever-changing human morality(social mores) and written and unwritten codes and laws that I must uphold and honor or I would be punished.

I remember at the age of 5 saying within myself: "this is a beautiful and horrible place. This is an up and down world.  I'm not sure I can do this. "

Humanity has been subjected, initially, to a consciousness of  judgments and measurements that are in stark contrast to the unconditional love that we are in our True Self.   In our false self identity, life's meaning has little to do with a God living in and as us. We develop a toxic and limiting self-consciousness,  which has been rooted in a lie based in individuality, and an overarching false identity.  Self-consciousness wreaks havoc on our heart/mind/soul operating system because we were built from the Manufacturer to run the software of unconditional love.

Love is all there is. All else is necessary experience for this realization.

Self-consciousness tends to create a life where practicality and function bow to a perceived assumption  that we are valued by our doings, our productivity, our acceptance within the ruling consciousness, or what the neighbors think about us, which becomes what we think about us.

I recall a friend who recently told me about a conversation he had with his daughter.  The daughter was deep into a kitchen reno , and the old, dated black appliances simply would not be stylish enough.  These appliances worked perfectly to keep the food cold, heat up the food, etc., but to "keep up with the Jones's," only stainless steel appliances would do.  Practicality and function bowing to the perception of the ruling (self) consciousness. The assumption that having stylish appliances would somehow forge a much needed deeper communion with those around them. But this is direct opposition to our True Self and the love and acceptance of us as we are.  How much energy do we expend on this bullshit? And for what? This is the tragedy of humanity in a false identity. Lot's of doing, but no being.

Within ourselves we ask illegitimate questions:  do I have a respectable career, the right house, a car that speaks of my success, am I productive enough, stylish enough so that people will accept me and love me.  

Humanity is under a great deal of pressure to look outside of themselves, while calculating on the inside, where the real creation exists, whether or not their lives are good enough.  But that inner chamber is reserved for unconditional love and intimate communion with our Father, who is more than pleased with us as we are.  So, intimacy and love have been replaced with a counterfeit union with what the Bible calls a harlot, who can not love us and can not fulfill our deepest needs.  This is a profound metaphor given to us in the scriptures and points to our Father who can only love and cherish us.  But how great a misunderstanding there is about his identity in us and our identity in him.

We are all clay temples.  We are a breathtaking design crafte  for intimate union. And yet it's become a place where we are exerting great amounts of emotional effort to enhance our financial standing in the outer world. An inner place where we work harder to improve ourselves that we might be respected in the eyes of our peers, or ourselves.  We wander around in these bodies attempting to legitimize our standing in people's eyes, not knowing we are already enough, already loved beyond measure and there is nothing we will ever have to do which will change that. Nothing.  It's free.

"We are all clay temples."

Imagine for a moment that this truth finds lodging as a seed in the soil of your heart. Imagine how much weight will be discarded. Imagine how different our experience in this world would be. I believe we are talking about heaven vs. hell.  Communion and rest vs. alienation. 

Humanity has become a place not of rest and peace and the unconditional acceptance of our Father for who we are, but where goals are set to get to the next level of whatever it is we've been sold on. We drive ourselves because we think our Father is a driver.  Nothing is further from the truth. The inner soul of humanity has become a brothel where we entertain every imaginable guest, when our Father is sitting right with us smiling upon us and saying. "what are you trying to prove. Enter into my rest."

So, what about our Father?

How much communion is actually occurring within the clay temple?  I believe the temple for most is a wilderness of self-temptation, self-barrenness, self-confrontation and self-exaltation, but on the verge of becoming a temple of love, peace, rest and a garden of humility and communion. 

Jesus faced 3 temptations in his wilderness experience that I believe we will also face as we journey back to the Father. 

Jesus Defeated Temptation to be Successful

Jesus renounced success in this world and made himself nothing. He was unsuccessful in material things, no nice chariot with 20's, his reputation was that of a Nazarene backwater loser and I'm not sure his carpentry career was all that great as he left that to wander around with no real program or patterned "ministry."  His goal: empty himself, absorb the violence, false consciousness of humanity and replace that consciousness with the True Self of unconditional love, which will ultimately rule the corporate soul.

I'm not sure Jesus was all that prosperous---can't prove that, and don't need to because he ended up on a Roman pole, mutilated and murdered by the ruling powers and he was abandoned by his followers and left alone to die.

Jesus' lack of success is apparent when he lost a popularity contest to a known criminal, Barabbas (name meaning Son of the Father).  Jesus became the scapegoat  displaying mankind's violent consciousness and revealed God's nature toward our violence, love and forgiveness. Religion still promotes God as a loving but violent "god", but Jesus showed us that it was our mindset that is violent and we have never been able to see our Father for who he really is.  Not a Judge, but a Loving Father.

I'm quite sure Jesus was not a success in the society he lived in.

 Jesus Defeated Temptation to be Powerful

We Western Christians like power.  We like our forceful politicians who bomb evil in other lands. We like our leaders to be tough on criminals. Politicians actually win approval by flipping  the switch to those put in the chair. But it's still force and murder.  

We've liked our leaders to look powerful, dress powerful display a confidence in all areas of their lives that draw people, because powerful leaders will change things. I hear church leaders talking about "leadership" in every conversation I'm in with them.  It's the idea that if we can just get the right leaders, who possess the right character and who do the right things, this ship will turn around.  We're still believing that, eh?  It hasn't and it won't work.  It's power, not harmony.  It's the subtle ego, not humility. Unless the surrender of Jesus to the ruling powers is the biggest failure in human history, or is surrender and relinquishing power, remaining silent, loving, not condemning, forgiving and not being bitter and vengeful the most foolish scandal in human history that is and will continue to work.    It really is His Story and it's about surrender, not power. 

 - Peter drew his sword to display power and force, but  Jesus said "put your sword away!" And Christ, which is Love and surrender healed the situation in every way.

-His disciples wanted to call down fire (their interpretation of heaven's power) because they had rejected the Jesus, but Jesus rebuked them and said "you know now what spirit you are of."

It's funny how Christendom's preachers perceive heaven's final solution as power through fire, which is scapegoating evil, not redeeming it.  "Just burn them and things will be ok for us." Really?  We're upset when ISIS does this to Christians, but we sit under Christendoms heinous doctrines of eternal torture and even fund it with our energy and finances. 

Christendom's false prophets won't ever preach about Jesus' rebuke of his disciples who want to throw people in fire for rejection. They hold fast to a literal a Lake of Fire, which is troubling misinterpretation and a lame rewards/punishment narrative.  Some now realize how unjust it is and that it can not be true.

 Do you suppose the preachers of today know what spirit they are of?  Do you suppose it's a spirit of false power, as they plant seeds of fear in the minds of those who won't align with their doctrines and interpretations? "Love God back or else."  "Turn or burn."  And so we fire up the heavenly ovens in eternity ala Auschwitz and our living Father, who seems more like Hitler or Stalin, gets his angels to throw in sinners because they had their chance and ****** it up.  Wow.  We have evolved to Wifi in our cars, but have we really changed that much in our ability to eliminate scapegoating and violence? Christendom refuses to remove these power trips and they wonder why fundamentalist religious ideas are now diagnosed as mental illness. It's crazier than a God who burns his creation for eternity because he loved them and they wouldn't love him back. The whole thing is falling down.

We are now residents of a kingdom of love.  I now see the Lake of Fire as God's love getting rid of hate, death and anything contrary to what Love will be and how Love will reign in and outside of us.  God throws those who don't have life and love, into a Lake of Love.  It's not punishment, that's so old school-default-setting, but its redemption and restoration. which is enlightened consciousness. The Lake of Fire is God in the metaphor in John's Revelation because God is Love. Even Paul says "God is All in all." 

-Jesus faced the egoic consciouness of Adam,  not some fallen angel who once led choirs in heaven, executed a coupe d'etat when God wasn't looking.  Silly.  Lucifer is Adamic consciousness. The war is within us and we don't battle flesh and blood beings but principles high in the mind that have been established are posers as truth but are lies. That inner ego  wanted him to bow down and claim the world by power, but Jesus later in his life bowed to the violence of men, not fighting back and displaying that our using force, violence and scapegoating the unfortunate who don't fit it, is not the way of Love. He actually became the scapegoat and absorbed our violence and sin, and then forgave us.  He was about forgiveness, love and harmony, not vengeance, hatred, force and retribution.  How did we miss this and in the same breath cheer that Osama Bin Laden has been vengefully killed or we say "he got what was coming to him" when our State murders a muderer?  Disconnect or what?

Jesus Defeated the Temptation to Be Right 

He prayed we would all be one.  He forgave his murderers.  Do you suppose he has been given all authority in heaven and on earth to speak such things?  And,  that in speaking such things, they would actually, and in eventuality, manifest? 

He didn't argue with the religious hierarchies about doctrines or dogma. He loved and didn't condemn.  In the wilderness when the satan approached him and sought to sift him, initially he said "It is written......." 

But later on when the offspring of the satan, the Pharisees, who were (and are) the religious elite, who lived by the letter, "their Scriptures" and what was written in the book and interpreted by them to be true, not what was standing before them as flesh, when they pointed to the Scriptures, what was his response. You've heard it said, but I tell you. It was their interpretation and he said "I'm standing here as the Father occupying human flesh (hint) and you stand there quoting scripture and your interpretations.  He didn't have to be "right". Jesus showed us that we don't need to be aligned or right because we're loved and treasured unconditionally and we're not measured by someone's interpretation of a doctrine or a scripture on a page, but by a loving Father who loves us unconditionally. 

 I given up on the respectable house, the car that has cache`, the career, etc.  I am who I am and it is decided within this Clay Temple, through the mysterious union of God and man, if things should change.  Pressure from on-lookers, critical measurements by self-appointed judges of my performance and behavior, or whoever wants to play armchair gods, I'm done with it. I'm into the voice within, not the voices that promote success, power and being right.

Saturday, June 27, 2015

Why So Serious

Why so serious, soul?
When the sun is shining and the clouds are rising
Over the western hills
A sea like glass
A glimpse into our destiny together
When we will all drink in this beauty
Peace reigning
For now
Just a few moments
Before the tide turns and it feels like hell again
Until then
I raise my glass
I slouch in my lawn chair
And let all the seriousness and self-conscious
You preachy types
Save the world
The idiots
Who don't know it's already saved
I've let it go

Sunday, June 21, 2015


My heart delights with those on the fringe
 Broken for the margins
Those pushed out and exploited
Who can not fit in
Who realize they never will
Fit into the plans of charlatans
Builders of kingdoms of self
Run, sons and daughters, run
Your vibration is not compatible
Not needing their validation
Needing nothing
We are complete
Within is unimaginable wealth
Planted before we were born
Into this virtual, lowered vibration
Not the wealth of men
The ideations of fools pursuing ego
But the wealth of God in Christ
Given all to the Son of God
Within you
Christ within you
Our hope of glory